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How Husbands Can Honor Their Wives

wifemanual(Guest Author Brian Weatherill)  I had a couple guys inquire about the “giving honor to one’s wife as the weaker vessel,” and after some study here is my personal opinion and understanding. For many of us in our experiences of marriage, we all tend to see the picture here as a literal manual to figure out our wives. (This is version 2.30.06-21 preceding versions).  You get the joke.  It is a daunting task for many of us, well all of us to really understand this amazing gift called our wife!  Here are three scriptures I want to reference to and I feel that they cohesively blend in their message for men.

Colossians 3:18-19
18 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.
19 Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

Ephesians 5:25-33
25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26 to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27 and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28 In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church— 30 for we are members of his body. 31 “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”32 This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. 33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.


1 Peter 3:7
Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.


So, as you see fellas, we have a few different “rules to follow” in regards to our wives. Many cultures across this world view women as merely servants to the husband. The word of God explains that we are to be like Christ, giving of ourselves unselfishly and without reward from our wives. Think about it, if Christ only did healings for mere vain glory or for praise from the crowd, what good is the true meaning of the cross?

Our wives may be the physically weaker vessels, but they are partners and joint heirs of the blessings in Christ. What good is the “two become one” verse if you are trying to require unrealistic respect when you yourself may not be feeding the respect to your wife the way she may need it? Here is a real kicker for us: what does it state in 1 Peter 3:7 at the end of the verse? “So that nothing will hinder your prayers.” Maybe we haven’t been honoring our wives as we should. I have failed countless times and wondered why my prayers weren’t being answered. Duh! My prayers were hindered because of my own selfish desires and preconceived ideas.


Let’s work on being partners with our wives. I am still learning this, and it’s been 23 years! God is faithful, and thankfully His word is fresh and the best “guiding light” for us in our marriages.


Be blessed in all you do!
Brian Weatherill

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